Last week, as recommended by a friend, I read an article (Reuters: Belinda Goldsmith) about the recent trend in today's world where men prefer being solo than to venture into a bad marriage and this article really caught my attention. Carl Weisman, in his book "So Why Have You Never Been Married? - Ten Insights into Why He Hasn't Wed," who is a bachelor himself discovers the true feelings of many men who afraid to take commitments in life or just got fed up being called a playboy or a loser. This book might help in giving women an insight on why some smart, intelligent and successful men choose to remain single as well as for men to understand why they are still comfortable being alone or enjoying life without a steady girlfriend at the age where most of the men already hooked up.
According to Weisman, most men are not afraid to get married but they were afraid of a bad marriage. I totally agreed with him in this due to the fact that the generation nowadays is among the first generation that grew up and live in a society where politely; 'family institution with problems such as bad divorce or parental disagreement' or 'broken families' is a norm. However, in my opinion, the people who chose not to get married just because they could not find the perfect one is just so selfish. It is definitely OK if you have not find the right one but in search of the perfect one, nobody is ever perfect in this world since the death of the Prophet (peace be upon him). After all, marriage is all about accepting, sharing and living with someone you loved or chose to love in an institution called family with you learning to live with all his/her imperfection and enjoy all the sweetness that comes together in doing it. If you get married just to have children, what will you do when suddenly something happen along the way to your wife that she could not give birth? Will you just leave her for another person? Or marry another person in order to get what you want? What if it is you who have 'the' problem? Therefore, as marriage is far more important than a trial and error experiment, I urged everyone to really consider every aspects before venturing into it. But maybe I am the one too worried about it while others just go with the flow..hihihi. Hope I am not among the commitment-phobe type described by Weisman!!!
Weisman also emphasized on why it is so important to these men to get it right. His advice to single women going after bachelors is for them to be patient. Women will just be frustrated if they are in a hurry to get married cause according to his research, the idea that single men were unhappy is untrue and many have found contentment in a never-married life. However, Weisman; an engineer-cum-author who currently attached to a relationship also looking to get married cause as he researched the book, he found that he was looking at men 10 years older than him and it was like looking into the future. He ought to change now cause if he do not change now, nothing would change him.
To friends who just get married or looking forward to get married soon, good luck and enjoy your marriage life! My turn will surely come in the future and I guess it is not going to be too soon and before it comes, it is better for me to live life to the fullest!!!
Hereby I attached some pictures of me with Kyoto futsal team at Kansai Sports Festival yesterday (We got 2nd place for futsal!!!). It was really not bad and a total blessing from God especially with a forever non-footballer (kaki bangku) like me in the team, when I scored a golden goal to win over Osaka and later guard our goal from being crushed much by Kobe, the champion of the tournament. Congrats to Tengku Madzli Ahmad Chuah Ahmad Wiltod Chuah who worked their best on the turf; Tengku Me, Danny Madzli, Ahmad Muji, Antu Chuah (scored 1 goal against All Star), Ahmad Janting, Madi Wiltod the Star (scored 3 wonderful goals against All Star!!!) and Jinbek Chuah (Please refer pic of us wearing the Malaysian National Hockey team jerseys..hihihi..got it as souvenirs when they visited Gifu for Olympic Qualifying match 2008). Look forward to enjoy futsal more!! Not to forget the Kyoto bowling team who champs the tournament (Great job!!! Ashraf, Daus, Kak enn, KakMek, Ida, Shahnun, Janting, Muji, Antu...tak sesia Round One tetiap malam seminggu direct...) and Kyoto futsal girl's team (good try!!Kak Mek, Saphirenn, Cik sal, Hanin, Yuyu, Fifi and Kapitan Neshi!!!). Cayalah Kyoto!!!
Kyoto Futsal Team 2008 (Kansai Sports Taikai ed.)
Thanks to Malaysian National Hockey Team!!!
Kyoto Spiders 08'!!! Spiders ke butterflies tue?haha..
Alamak! In action ler plak..kui2
Split seconds after the goal against Osaka..sorry Aca, Pdot n Kimu...hihihi
The winning team..Kyoto Bowling Team 08'..Moonlight Strike tue......*credits to DSLR pics taken by Kyoto's Hanin & Wakayama's Aimi.
13 comments:
oooo... ada blog rupenyer...
lama tak dengar cite pasal ko....
moga baik2 saja...
aku pun sekarang rasa tak nak kahwin lagi...
nak enjoy hidup sorang dulu...
tak mahu ada komitmen lain....hehe
ingat nak fokus pada famili....
bunyi cam mulia tapi tak pun...
ada orang bagi tahu aku yang kawin ni untuk memberi... bukan menerima...
tu yang cam aku x leh time skit..
pikir bekali2 untuk kawin...hehe
wahwah2..makin meriah kyoto..mggu lepas hiking ek..mggu ni taikai lak..rindu menebal kt geng2 kyoto nih..haha..ade mase aku turun kyoto..chow bro..
twenty years from now, u will be more disapointed by the things u didnt do than by the ones u did do. so throw off the bowlines. sail away from the safe harbor. catch the trade winds in ur sails. explore. dream. discover!! ur vision will become clear only when u look into ur heart...who looks outside dreams, who looks inside awakens. n the more faithfully u listen to the voice within u, the better u hear wut is sounding outside you!!
my 2 cents piece of mind
(^^)/
what women want: to be loved, to be listened to, tp be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be trusted, and sometimes, just to be held.
what men want: tickets for the World Series.
men n women do not hv exactly the same objectives in mind. in getting into the field of marriage, one very importnt decision u must make is who, exactly, will be ur spouse. m not saying this is the MOST important decision. it is certainly not as importnt as selecting the right wedding caterer. but u shud definitely give it some thot =)..
..p ramlee!! didnt know u can play ball! nice shot tho! i think i kinda miss kyoto larr..
tayah letak gmba byk2 boleh tak?
*sigh*
we can only hope/doa (or watvea u want to call it) and the rest is no longer within our power...ppl say u hv to try to work it out but if its already destined, wat to do..redha aja..normally ppl wud go straight to blame game, but if u really give it a thought-it is not meant to be n therefore move on...eh btw wassup with this marriage issue..enjoy dulu maa~~get to know more people, barula x end up with the wrong ones..this world is full of weirdos and freakss carefulllll~~adioss..
kehkehkeh....caya la koch!! dun forget to display these photos to ur student one day!!
masa itu harusla kao sudah gumuk, buncit, botak atau beruban...
salam, oooo jersey pinjam yer, good..good keep it up, next time be the champ and love is in the air.
wassalam
@kyoto, japan
ah nyampah tgk sume ni!
*sobS* my used to b cute kohais all grown up..dah tak cute..
Hahaha..10Q super-sub, taruk nama aku Wiltod the star..hehehehe...nk kembang hidung sekejap.aku suke dgn taikai nie..biar orang lain jeles.jgn lupe 20 ekor ayam yang ko nak belaja untuk parti nanti.tambah lg 10 ekor yer sbb bowling no 1. Chow.
Peace-peace kacang pis!
salam, oitt madihah, wiltord,wiltord gak, solat jumaat lamo tak nampak, kelas, kelas gak dunio tu semuo...akhirat kono jago gak, sekian... posan pak cik baik-baik kayuh biskal, kono langar payah kang takdo striker lak kyoto spider nie, hehehehheheh.
wassalam
@europe to euro 2008.
"eh sape score sape score tadi?? "
sekilas kemudian melihat Tengku berlari2 sambil tersengih lebar~~
hello kojack (betol ke tuh nama you?),
i came across your blog after blog hop from another acquaintance who apparently studying in Tokyo. after reading a few posts and I found out that you are Panasonic scholars, what a deja-vu to know that since I am the candidate for Panasonic scholarship this year, and will be attending the interview this upcoming July).
its nice to read your experience in Kyoto and wish you all the best in your Masters.
Cheers,
Firdaus
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