Amazing Autumn

Isn't life wonderful? Appreciate yourself, live life...

Pics taken with my fav FZ38, lightweight and never fails...

where else other than Kyoto...

November rantings

Have you ever have one day in your life that you feel like you're carrying your office, your family and everyone else on your shoulders?

While being committed to your responsibilities (God, work, family, society etc.) to keep the fire inside you burning is somehow good, it is inevitable that life sometimes could be stressful. This is due to the fact that the concept of living life to the fullest doesn't mean that you could totally ignore the classic goals of settling down, raising a family and finding a career that you love.

It should be noted that experience on bizarre things in life is also necessary to kill the emptiness of your daily routine. When you feel guilty about it, just take it as something like icing on a cake to round up your existence as a man, or just as fuel to the potentially amazing stories to be shared with friends casually.

It is a tough life eventually but don't lose it completely. As much as we have to stick to the daily grind, there are ways to ease the stress and reduce the pressures.

As for me, I think nature has the remedy. So I am currently looking forward for my first November hiking this Sunday. :)

Happy autumn to everyone! With the red leaves soon to be falling, I hope everyone will find their own simple ways to live life lighter. All the best!

Happy Deepavali / Diwali to everyone who celebrate the festival of lights!

Zul Ilham a.k.a Kojack

Wake me up when September ends...

Nobody is perfect. But that doesn't stop us from always trying to be a better. Some people might erroneously assume that once he/she graduated, have a good career and partner, no further development and training are required. It is in reality that the peak of feeling too secured and overconfident will be the time where most of us lose our persistency; the fire that is burning inside ourselves to ensure we will be doing our best in whatever that we do will be blown away.

Changes are inevitable and although it is often humbling, we must not forget to assess our own strengths and weaknesses. Some people find it is hard to accept that we are lacking in certain areas but even if you believe you possess the right traits and character, there is always room for improvement. Somehow, the people around you especially your superior could notice that you are working yourselves up and this is a plus point in your career or life.

Some friends of mine would not spend a dime to travel. They feel that material possession by having a large cash so that wealth could be showed externally through fashion and gadget is far more better than traveling. One has to remember that things might be once, nice and new but it will fade over time, decreasing in value and stature. Memories, on the other hand, are priceless and last much longer.

When you travel, you will be able to see and feel things you have never seen and felt before. These experiences could not be forced, purchased and hard to reproduced. It is an investment on traits that you would not get domestically. If you travel to less fortunate places, you may realize that you already live well, making you appreciate your origins, family and home even more. Without leaving your comfort zone, you put your character at risk by thinking that you are always the master but unfortunately, only at your place. If we travel to places better than ours, it could teach us a lot of things too. Ideas to improve what existed in our place and traits possessed by people in a civilized nation could be obtained.

Some may brag about their modified imported sport car and their latest mobile phone but far more important than what you possess physically is the traits inside you. By traveling, you gained experiences and charisma, thus, altering the way you carry yourself by boosting your self-confidence naturally without showing even a glimpse that you are trying too hard to be what you are not.

Let us continue improving what we do and each part of ourselves too in a dynamic ongoing process. The people in life that are always working to improve are the ones having massive success, in whatever they do. Get rid of the idea that someday we will "arrived" cause life is a journey itself. Work hard, believe in God and be open to growth. Soon, It will be autumn here in Kyoto but the summer's heat must be kept in ourselves, to keep the momentum going and to drive us with the same pace throughout the upcoming cold season.

Happy Merdeka Day and Happy Malaysia Day to Malaysians; Salam Eid-Fitri to Moslems and Happy Autumn to all!!!

Zul Ilham a.k.a koJACK

Young adults out there...Don't worry...This is our time!!!

Obsessed with BlackBerry, iPhone and Android? How about some of us who are still addicted to games; Wii, PS3, Emulator King for PC (Do people still have them?), Dota, etc...Fashionista? Cupcakes-luvva? Pretentious Diva? Struggling with weight, BMI and complexion? Sports-maniac?NikeRunner or RunKeeper? XXX-maniac? Living like a bohemian? Hippies? Player? Biatch? Extreme-conservative, ultra-progressive, liberals or partisans? Guitar-pro or guitar-poser? Drummer?....Don't worry! 20 to 30 years of age is our "Adult Adolescence" years...and we could just do whatever we want...for now...

I will be 26 soon and it's the next half of this so-called adult adolescence years...So I'll write based on what I see around me...something from me, my friends...younger and elder adults than me...

In our early 20s (22-23), we just graduated from our undergraduate studies...Some took longer time (doctors, lawyers and late-bloomers?)...we were geared up for life...with a degree in hand...we have dreams and aspirations...we thought we know everything about what we want from our career...

but the reality is...no matter how popular and famous we were in college...how smart we were in marking the dean's list...in the real world, we're back at the bottom of the food chain...again!

20-30s is the time to discover our true career...try to find ways to enjoy what we're doing right now...even if we're frustrated, just think it as a temporary phase...this is the most important time to gain valuable career experience...learn to deal with people we don't really like...learn new skills you never knew you have...make money and enjoy what you do.

In 20s, dating life is like starting all over again...but this time "its playing for keeps"...we will start thinking of the possibilities that we were dating a person we might want to marry one day...along the way, you'll figure out you still have a lot to learn...you don't want to date undergraduate girls cause they are too young for you...and you'll find out that older women want to date guys in their mid-20s...but don't get jacked off...learn to process it and determine what the lesson is...so you don't repeat the same mistake...it is really a time to learn...if you are with your long-termed partner...bring new sparks into the relationship...change the way you treat each other...find new interesting things to look forward together...maybe it's the time to move closer to the next step...you just have to keep in mind that the girl you are dating now might be the one you gonna live together for the rest of your life...so could you stand her babbling? could she understand your needs? I know it's a longggg list of checklists but now is the time to check it! Before the 'M' word being discussed, try to list all the traits you like about her...and try to imagine living with her without all the traits...if you could love her in any circumstances, only then, you could discuss the 'M' word....What you love about her might not be there forever...Looks, it will change over time with wrinkles and lines...Her caring nature and tenderness, what if she caught a serious illness where you will be the one providing her needs? The way she loves you, what if one day she could not even remember your name?...waking up everyday with no memory of yesterday? Will you still love her the way you love her now? If you could...then she is the one for you! Same to girls out there, check your guys!

Work hard but relax when you need to. Go out there and meet people. Talk to as many as you could, learn from the experiences. Figure out who you are through your interactions with other people and with yourself. Relax, dig in and learn all you can.

Finance. Most of us will not be living with our parents anymore, although some do. Surely, there will be a time of low-tide, having a little bit of cash with outstanding balance of credit card debts. You'll eat only at cheap joints mostly to cover your occasional splurge at fancy restaurants and cafes....not to mention your branded clothes and shoes...When you have a great career one day, you'll look back and think of it as one of the favorite times in your life.

An older friend told me, enjoy your adult adolescence because this time is magical. The stress is there but the 'Wow' will become the stuff for good memories as we get older.

One important thing is not to compare yourself to any of your friends who may be having incredible financial success. This life is long and not a sprint...If you reach the maximum too early, there will be plateau and stagnant period at the time you are not supposed to...better conduct your finances like a marathon, you'll better off in the long run...Save money each week by cutting the non-essentials...start the nesting egg and don't worry about starting small...Look into some investment funds that have done well over the long haul (Strictly NOT pyramid scheme or MLM).

You moods may change too and there will be times you get a little depressed at times. But don't beat yourself up and don't be too hard on yourself. Understand that things will be fine and believe that you'll be having a wonderful, amazing, kick-ass life...

Look at this time now as the time to make mistakes, learn from it, grow, and figure yourself out in order to plan for a great future! and GOD knows about it...Always pray for chances and repent when you need to...

p/s: Pictures were old memories in the author's hard drive, edited with HDR-ish touch and have no direct linkages to the article.

The Land of The Real Americans...Arizona

I've been lucky...That's what they said...and I agreed...And I thanked Allah...The One and Only, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful...for giving me continuous opportunities to see the world...

I've been craving to go to Lyon, France this year...to attend the European Biomass Conference...the one attended by Asmadi and Matsuoka in Hamburg, Germany last year....but the due date passed us by without any direction from the boss (Yes, doing PhD in Japan, it is your boss (sensei, supervisor) who will evaluate and instruct you to go and present in conferences...not by your own choice)...But suddenly in the middle of no plan to go abroad...my boss called me one morning and he showed me a letter the from the American Oil Chemists' Society (AOCS)...and that letter is the one that brought me to the Native American land...Arizona...as the recipient of AOCS Industrial Oil Division Award...and it was a God-sent...to show me the other side of the world I have never ventured into...

Arizona doesn't lend itself to sedate, restrained discussion. Arizona is just plain sheer extravagance. One of its river spent 10 million years carving the Grand Canyon, the greatest natural spectacle in the world. I bet all of us had, at least, heard the name of the Grand Canyon and this place definitely tops the Must-go-list for geologists, environmentalists and nature-lovers from all around the world.

Another river transformed a quarter million acres of central Arizona desert into one of the most intensively cultivated and most productive agricultural areas in the world and prompted the development of one of the major cities in the American west.

One unique fact about Arizona is that, by traveling up North from Phoenix, you could cover the whole landscapes that America has to offer. From the largest unbroken stand of ponderosa pine forest to the desert land thick with other worldly plant life; a dreamland of thorns and sinews and leafless tree. Some Arizona mountains are gray-ash-heaps, others the immense, thickly-forested hulks of dead volcanoes. Arizona's dramatic landscape has a history to match, and the people whom history has brought here demonstrate the same bewildering diversity as the land forms on which they live.

Hopi and Navajo Americans who look at the world through two thousand year old eyes (Extremely conservative although a little trendy nowadays>>>), Mexican-Americans, descendants of an empire that once reached north into Arizona and South as far as Chile, farmers, loggers, hunters, buckaroos and broncobusters...the list is endless and my 10-days excursion is not enough to dive deeper into this perplexing community...and here, then, is Arizona. See it by your own eyes...and you'll be amazed...

Goodbye spring....

What is the best way to say goodbye?

Believe it or not, saying goodbye is easy but it is really hard to adhere your action with your words.

The "goodbye" that I am discussing about is not just the normal parting greet but it do means more than that.

Try imagining leaving the "old you" for a new path. What is the best way to say goodbye to your old self? You will be living in the same environment with the same people, facing the daily normal routines and challenges, but the one who will change is only you. How do you say goodbye? Memories, will be the most haunted thing that deter your progress.

How about in leaving your "old world"? You will move to a new place, creating a new chapter to start with and meet new people. In this case, do you have to say goodbye? Especially, when your previous chapters in life were more interesting and bizarre. What if you suddenly meet with any person from your "old world" who knew your old trade? Doesn't saying goodbye is hard enough in this situation?

What if being honest and saying what's on your mind is not enough to make everything depart?

No matter how hard it is, the best way might just be by not saying "goodbye" to end something...Just try to part with it with no hard feelings...

Spring Fever, Eco-living and Mama's Day

Spring Fever

Spring is the time where strange illness sets in. Sun begins to warm, tops reveal

more colours and skirts gets a little shorter. It is a phenomenon still could not be proven biologically but it surely has something to do with your body chemistry. The change of season from the low felts during winter time to longer daytime affects our melatonin, the well-known sleep hormone. For people living in an equatorial country like Malaysia, it might be that the effects could not be felt, due to the all-year-long sunny days. No wonder Malaysians tend to be at high mood and energy at all time. In Kyoto, a flurry of energy is to spring. With days getting longer, weather getting longer, endorphins flowing harder and fashion of men and women getting, well, 'hotter', it is no surprise that it affects our mood and excitement. And as for me, I hope it affects me the right way. Can't wait for my first American Southwest adventure next week.

Eco-living

The smallest steps can make a big difference to the world. Did you know that we use billions of plastic bags every year? I use an eco-bag for my groceries to minimize the usage of plastics and

shop from a farmer's shop for local products. Even in my research, I had

accidentally found a potential path to produce eco-plastic component from lignin-derived materials but I just could not pursue it now due to

some conflict of interest with my current biodiesel research theme. However, I am sure I could study on everything I couldn't do now (due to strict supervisory) because I will be a boss of myself when I get back to Malaysia later. So everyone, think green and act green!!! Small changes in your behavior could lead to great changes in our natural environment!!!

Mama's Day

I do agree that motherhood is a tough job. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, no pay, no day-off, sometimes it is unappreciated (when your children rebel against your advice, of which, normally done for their own good), yet resignation is impossible. God created mother to bring joy, warmth, love and happiness to the world. For my mama, and all moms in the world, thank you for being a great mom!!! Happy mother's day!!!

Mo-An Cafe, my favourite organic cafe up on Yoshida Mt., Kyoto.

Moderatia

I am not that old to be too matured and not too young to be so naive...but somehow, I personally believe that by taking a quiet personal time to indulge in reminiscence, one could identify their weaknesses in the past and build a plan for better days ahead...

I hate reflecting on the past citing how things 'used to be' and I don't want to be like a drunk person whining about everyone's fault here and there...but things do changed over time...and with these changes...I have to change....

After a few years abroad, I am a changed man myself...I tend to see things differently..interpret things from a broader points of view...and lead my life based on my personal knowledge and understandings, which should be, under the guidance of Al-Quran and Hadith as a normal Muslim does...

But right now, I feel like I am in the mid of a really really big expressway with so many lanes...feeling a little bit lost...all are heading to the same direction which are moving forward ahead but with differences in difficulties and practices...Some people said that you will be caught in your own mind if you try to venture too depth into things unknown to you (Aqida', Fiqh, Islamic thought) without the guidance from a real wise scholar (Mursyid)...I have read many books, learned from videos and web information (and maybe too many) without suitable discussions and corrections which I used to have from my God-sent KISAS (Sultan Ahmad Shah Islamic College, a renowned high school of Islamic studies) pals (Tawil in Asasi UM, Hidhir in 2nd Residential College UM, Firdaus Wahab during my 1st year and 2nd year in Japan)...Back in MCKK, there were Nik Nazmi (Nur Islam's pen-name: Tajdid Hadhari), Pok Ya, Pok Li, Mas Mohd. Sukri and Mad (to name a few from BRU) who contributed balanced opinions and thoughts to me...and currently...I do miss those good old times...where we could discuss and debate our opinions towards certain Islamic issues...either it is fundamental or applied...
In my current situation, I prefer drifting than drowning...

When trapped between ideologies...Islamic liberalism, Islamic Intellectual Anarchism, Islamic Spiritual Bohemian, Neo-Muslim and Muslim Conservatism...I think I will go along the route of moderation...

Say: "O people of the Book! exceed not in your religion the bounds (of what is proper), trespassing beyond the truth, nor follow the vain desires of people who went wrong in times gone by,- who misled many,and strayed (themselves) from the even way" (Al-Maidah (5):77)

May God (Allah) lead us to the righteous way and bless us all...

Religion is to do right, it is to do good. It is to love, it is to serve, it is to think, it is to be humble...So are you religious?
(quoted and modified from Azmi Rasheed Khan's status)

Hail the start of a new spring…

[In reply to a friend] It is true…that sometimes…in Japan, you could feel so lonely and naked…I always believed in the “do your best and God will do the rest”…

[Quoting anonymous comment] In life, everything that revolves around heart is bound to be complicated and hurtful…streams of tears will be your loyal companion and the feeling of your heart sunk deep down is almost way to usual...but then again that's what makes u stronger…be thankful that you have your loving family's support...don’t ever let your heart interfere when you're making a decision that could last a life time…get the fact straight ..MOST IMPORTANTLY don’t ever give regret a chance to take place...always remember that regret exist only when the one that we care about are no longer within our reach…BE WISE...BE VERY WISE…

Am I wise enough? m(_ _)m

[Quoting another anonymous comment] Time is limited…So don’t waste it living someone else’s life…Don’t be trapped by dogma-which is living by the results of other people’s thinking…Don’t let the noise of others opinion drown out your inner voice…And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition…They somehow already know what you truly want to become...

As much as I hate to disagree with your opinions, you have been my inspirational light of hope…Blessed I am to know such a wonderful person like u…I’ll die forever in debt of your kindness…For whatever reasons it seemed being there in your life; I can thank no other but Allah that our path crossed…For being you, just being plain you, I can no other answer make, but thanks n thanks…

[Chartlotte in Charlotte’s Web] You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what's a life, anyway? We're born, we live a little while, and we die. A spider's life can't help being something of a mess, with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone's life can stand a little of that...

In remembrance of Spring 2008 and in celebration of Spring 2010, I repost this…..

In life, when your path crossed into someone else’s lane, it should not choked you speechless and turn you into somebody else. This is due to the fact that you may be destined by God to come into their life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Each which you will never knew until you end your chapter with them.

When you are into someone life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need they have expressed. Maybe you are their answered prayers or just plain Godsend. You have come to assist them through a difficulty, to provide them with guidance and support, to aid them physically, emotionally or spiritually. You are there for the reason they need you to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, the person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that their need has been met, their desires fulfilled, so your work is done. The prayer they sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Sometime you come into someone else’s life for a season, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. You bring them an experience of peace or make them laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season!

People said that lifetime relationships should teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

For all, thank you for giving me a chance to be part of your life either it is for a reason, a season or hopefully for an ongoing lifetime later on. I do really appreciate it and please forgive me if I have blown my chance to do things at my best during my tenure in your life. Hope I have made your life complete. Have a good day!!!

"It is always possible that ye dislike a thing which is good for ye, and that ye love a thing which is bad for ye. But Allah knoweth...and ye know not" (Al-Baqarah:216)

[After all, if there is only one life and you’re not making something good with it, then what is the point of living…]

Sweet little things in life...

Nowadays, in the age of "materialism", most of us seem to go after bigger and fancier things with lesser interest into smaller things, particularly those with aesthetics, spiritual, intelligent or cultural values.

Education is merely a business and the times when education was delivered sincerely by those who know a little more (teachers) to those who just know a few tiny things (young generations of the community) had past us by. I believed that education is supposed to produce a vigorous and intelligent race of young men who will be in touch with modern progress, but not out of touch with old traditions. And the young men should be liberally educated but not educated out of sympathy; who will be manly and not effeminate, strong-minded but not strong-willed, acknowledging a duty to others instead of being a law unto themselves and who will be fit to do something in the world instead of settling down into fops, spendthrifts or drones (Borrowing a few words from R.J. Wilkison, 1903).

What happen to the old good days of the world? Terrorist attacks were certainly a tragedy, but yet more people are killed on roads each day or so due to alcoholic drivers, reckless road maniacs and stupid ignorant law abusers. Maybe it is about time that the world press educates people more with their news than trying to generate hate and anxiety. I am myself, a Muslim but my faith does not stop me from visiting and admiring the serenity and tranquility of Japanese shrines and temples (Thousands of them scattered around in Kyoto). For it is the pillars inside you that defines what you are as a whole and God knows the rest. If everyone respects each other's differences and trying to focus more on building any relationship based on similarities, we definitely could be good citizens of the world, living in harmony and peace.

I am not trying to promote 'minimalism' here cause life has no meaning without us living in it. But let us be sincere...as when we are sincere and true to ourself and to others...unspoken words could be delivered well.

Remember that when you forgive, you could love...and when you love...God shines the light on you...Trust me, happiness is only real when shared....

To end this post, let us ponder the words of the poem Invictus;

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever God may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate....

I am the captain of my soul...

(William Ernest Henley, 1875)

* Pics taken at Kamogawa, February 2010